Raghu Kalyan's

(Fun) Laugh for a while - ads from matrimonial sites

2010-11-18T22:02:00.000-08:00

*****

Hello, To Viewers My Name is Shekhar , I am single i don't have female, I am not a good education but i working all field in Bangalore.. if u like me u welcome to my heart...when ever u want to meet pls visit my resident or send u letter.. Thanks yours Regards Shekhar
*****

I want very simple girl. from Brahmin educated family from orissa state she is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework

(Homework?)
*****

Wants a woman who knows me better and can adjust with me forever. she may never create any difficulties in my life or her life by which the entire life can run smoothly. thank you

(The principle of running life smoothly was never so easy!)
*****

She should be good looking and should have a service. she Should have one brother and one sister. she should be educated.

(ain't it unique !! 1 brother 1 sister criteria !)
*****

hello.... My name Arthi..... I am a good characterized woman. I want to run my life happily. I expect the good minded and clean habits boy to marry me soon.... who may be in the same caste . If anyone want to Marie to me u can visit to my home

(Ghar Chale aana........ ???)
*****

I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Because friendship is a first step of love. I am looking for my dream girl who will love me more than i. Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on ........hold my hand forever !!!

(The dilwale dulhaniya effect)
*****

I am simple boy. I have lot of problem in my life because of my luck now i am looking one gal she care me and love me lot lot

(I don't know why but this is one of my favorites)
*****

My wife should be as 'Shivani' as in Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki and as Tanwerr as in KSBKBT......

(Ok I haven't seen these soaps but I am sure he must be demanding too much,ain't he?)
*****

I want a girl with no drinks if she wants she can wear jeans in house but while stepping out of house she should give respect to our cast

(by not wearing her jeans? Wat the hell...)
*****

HYE I AM A GOOD LOOKING BOY ,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH'S BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD.

THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A GIRL ,THEY ARE 1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFESSION AND THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.

(all of us are loughing{laughing} )
*****

Whatever she may be but she should feel that she is going to be someone bride and she must think of the future life if she is too like this she would be called the woman of the lamp

(I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me what this boy wants)
*****

I love my partner i marriage the partner ok i search my partner and i love the partner ok thik hai the partner has a graduate ok

(I am again clueless but I liked the use of "ok". The person is suffering from "Ok-syndrome" )
*****

HI I AM VERY COOL NUATHER OK MY HOBBY IS SEE TV AND NEWS OK I HAVE 1 CAR AND 1 BOWL OK MY MOTHER ALSO GOOD OK MY FARUET WORLD IS OK

(the "ok syndrome" again)
*****

I am pran my family history my two brother two sister and Father&mother sister complitly marred

(somebody please explain in comments section how to get married 'completely' ?)
*****

I am very simple and honest. i have three sister one brother and parent. iam doing postal service and tailor master my original residence at kalahandi diste naw iam staing at rayagada dist. (actually what is this guy doing? Postal service or tailor.??)
*****

My name is muhamad and i am unmarried. please you marriage me please please please please please please please

(height of desperation! )
*****

I want one girl who love me or my mother. she love me heartily or she have frank she's skin color 'normal' not a black or not a whitey. I Think the main think is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are beautiful. but iam not a handsome guy or not a good looking. but my Mom say that Iam a good guy. My father already expired . THE CHOICE IS YOUR. bye bye.

(uttama purushan)
*****

I am kanan. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was marred.

(No comments)
*****

I AM LITTLE FAIR INDIAN COLOR. I DON'T HAVE ANY HABIT.

(maybe the poor guy meant BAD habits)
*****

My color is black, but my heart is white. I like social service

(Zebra..???)
*****

I'm looking out for who lives in Bombay, girl simple who trust me lot should be roman catholic, LOVE ME ONLY.

(Now that criterion is a must, isn't it?)
*****

To be married on jun-2006. working woman preferable.

(this guy has fixed the marriage date too! But he is yet to find a bride. I wish him best of luck on behalf of all of us. I am sure he will get one soon.)
*****

I would like a beautiful girl. and I do not want her any treasure. because girl is the maharani.

(Now she is going to be a lucky girl! Any takers?)
*****

ssc failed three times and worked with private ltd company which not paying salary at present.

(Any takers again?)

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun) Classic Definitions

2010-11-10T22:26:00.000-08:00

CLASSIC DEFINITIONS

Cigarette	A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
Love affairs	Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
Marriage	It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
Divorce	Future tense of marriage
Lecture	An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
Conference	The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise	The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Tears	The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ..
Dictionary	A place where divorce comes before marriage.
Conference Room	A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
Ecstasy	A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
Classic	A book which people praise, but do not read.
Smile	A curve that can set a lot of things straight
Office	A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn	The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc...	A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee	Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience	The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb	An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher	A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
Diplomat	A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
Opportunist	A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
Optimist	A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
Pessimist	A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
Miser	A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
Father	A banker provided by nature.
Criminal	A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
Boss	Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Politician	One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Doctor	A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

Source: Internet Forward

(Information) Learning new languages on the Internet

2010-10-23T20:13:00.000-07:00

Following are some of the websites to learn (natural) languages across the world:

bbc.co.uk/languages/
live-mocha.com
babbel.com
elanguageschool.net
mangolanguages.com
languageguide.org

verbalplanet.com
italki.com
word2word.com

langolab.com
busuu.com
about.com

Source: Eenadu Sunday supplement (Oct 24, 2010)

(Information) Is it Victory Venkatesh or Maharsi Venkatesh

2009-09-27T18:58:00.000-07:00

http://greatandhra.com/ganews/viewnews.php?id=16331&cat=1&scat=4

Mediatation invokes the inner self. It helps to maintain balance inside ourselves. There are lot more. not to make fun about Telugu Actor Venkatesh; want to focus on Meditation.

(Info) Love your job not your company

2008-09-26T07:10:00.001-07:00

LOVE YOUR JOB, BUT NEVER FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR COMPANY
BCOZ U NEVER KNOW WHEN COMPANY STOPS LOVING YOU
- Narayana Murthy

Extract of Mr. Narayana Murthy's Speech during Mentor Session:
I know people who work 12 hours a day, six days a week, or more. Some people
do so because of a work emergency where the long hours are only temporary.

Other people I know have put in these hours for years. I don't know if they are working all these hours, but I do know they are in the office this long.

Others put in long office hours because they are addicted to the workplace.

Whatever the reason for putting in overtime, working long hours over the long term is harmful to the person and to the organization.

There are things managers can do to change this for everyone's benefit.

Being in the office long hours, over long periods of time, makes way for potential errors. My colleagues who are in the office long hours frequently make mistakes caused by fatigue. Correcting these mistakes requires their time as well as the time and energy of others. I have seen people work Tuesday through Friday to correct mistakes made after 5 PM on Monday.

Another problem is that people who are in the office long hours are not pleasant company. They often complain about other people (who aren't working as hard); they are irritable, or cranky, or even angry. Other people avoid them. Such behavior poses problems, where work goes much better when people work together instead of avoiding one another. As Managers, there are things we can do to help people leave the office.

First and foremost is to set the example and go home ourselves. I work with a manager who chides people for working long hours.

His words quickly lose their meaning when he sends these chiding group e-mails with a time-stamp of 2 AM, Sunday.

Second is to encourage people to put some balance in their lives.
For instance, here is a guideline I find helpful:

1) Wake up, eat a good breakfast, and go to work.
2) Work hard and smart for eight or nine hours.
3) Go home.
4) Read the comics, watch a funny movie, dig in the dirt, play with your kids, etc.
5) Eat well and sleep well.
This is called recreating. Doing steps 1, 3, 4, and 5 enable step 2.

Working regular hours and recreating daily are simple concepts. They are hard for some of us because that requires personal change. They are possible since we all have the power to choose to do them. In considering the issue of overtime, I am reminded of my oldest son. When he was a toddler, if people were visiting the apartment, he would not fall asleep no matter how long the visit, and no matter what time of day it was. He would fight off sleep until the visitors left. It was as if he was afraid that he would miss something. Once our visitors' left, he would go to sleep. By this time, however, he was over tired and would scream through half the night with nightmares. He, my wife, and I, all paid the price for his fear of missing out.

Perhaps some people put in such long hours because they don't want to miss anything when they leave the office. The trouble with this is that events will never stop happening. That is life!! Things happen 24hours a day.

Allowing for little rest is not ultimately practical. So, take a nap. Things will happen while you're asleep, but you will have the energy to catch up when you wake.

Hence "LOVE YOUR JOB BUT NEVER FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR COMPANY"

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun and Info) Modern names for GODS - software context

2008-06-14T14:36:00.000-07:00

Brahma : Systems Installation
Vishnu : Systems Support
Lakshmi : Finance and Accounts consultant (SAP)
Shiva : DBA (crash specialist)
Ganesh : Documentation specialist
Narada : Data Transfer
Brihaspathi : Chief Information Officer.
Yama : ReOrganisation Consultant
ChitraGupta : Personnel Records
Apsaras : Downloadable Viruses
Devas : Y2k Programmers
Surya : Solaris adminstrator
Rakshasas : In house Hackers
Ram : Hardware Support - single user specialist
Lakshman : Support software and Backup
Ravan : Internet Explorer - WWW
Hanuman : RS6000
Vali : Windows 98
Sugreeva : Win 95
Angadh : Win 3.1
Jambhuvan : DOS
Vishwamitra : Sr.Manager Projects
Hastinapur : Silicon Valley
Arjun : Lead Programer (all Companies are Vying for him)
Abhimanyu : Trainee Programmer
Draupadi : Web server - free access (Shareware)
Bhima : MAIN FRAME
Duryodhan : Microsoft product written in VB
Shakuni : Bill Gates
Karna : Contract Programmer
Shikandi : Steve Jobbs
100 Kauravas : Microsoft Service Packs and Patches

(Fun) Modern names for Companies

2008-06-14T14:34:00.000-07:00

1. NIIT : Not Interested in IT
2. WIPRO : Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output
3. HCL : Hidden Costs & Losses
4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions
5. INFOSYS : INFerior Offline SYStems
6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping
7. BAAN : Beggers Assosciation and Nerds
8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines
9. SATYAM : Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly
10. PARAM : Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors
11. C-DOT : Coffee During Office Timings
12. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible
13. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort
14. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers
15. BFL : Brainwash First, and Let them go
16. DELL : Deplorable Equipment & LackLusture
17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd
18. PSI : Peculiar Symptoms of India
19. PCL : Poor Computers Ltd
20. SPARC : Simply Poor And Redundant Computer! s
21. SUN : Surely Useless Novelties
22. CRAY : Cry Repeatedly After a Year
23. TUL : Troubles Un Limited
24. CTS : Coff! ee, Tea and Snacks
25. ICIM : Impossible Computers In Maintenance
26. TI : Tactless Idiots
27. BPL : Below Poverty Line
28. HP : Hungry people

Source: Internet Forward

FACTS TO MAKE EVERY Indian PROUD

2008-01-28T07:02:00.000-08:00

Q. Who is the co-founder of Sun Microsystems?
A. Vinod Khosla

Q. Who is the creator of Pentium chip (needs no introduction as 90% of the today's computers run on it)?
A. Vinod Dahm

Q. Who is the third richest man on the world?
A. According to the latest report on Fortune Magazine, it is Lakshmi Mittal.

Q. Who is the founder and creator of Hotmail (Hotmail is world's No.1 web based email program)?
A. Sabeer Bhatia

Q. Who is the president of AT & T-Bell Labs (AT & T-Bell Labs is the creator of program languages such as C, C++, Unix to name a few)?
A. Arun Netravalli

Q. Who is the GM of Hewlett Packard?
A. Rajiv Gupta

Q. Who is the new MTD (Microsoft Testing Director) of Windows 2000, responsible to iron out all initial problems?
A. Sanjay Tejwrika

Q. Who are the Chief Executives of CitiBank, Mckensey & Stanchart?
A. Victor Menezes, Rajat Gupta, and Rana Talwar.

Q. We Indians are the wealthiest among all ethnic groups in America, even faring better than the whites and the natives.
There are 3.22 millions of Indians in USA (1.5% of population). YET,
38% of doctors in USA are Indians.
12% scientists in USA are Indians.
36% of NASA scientists are Indians.
34% of Microsoft employees are Indians.
28% of IBM employees are Indians.
17% of INTEL scientists are Indians.
13% of XEROX employees are Indians.

Source: Internet Forward

India Republic Day special - country map

2008-01-28T07:00:00.001-08:00

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India Republic Day special - country map

2008-01-28T07:00:00.000-08:00

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(Information) Many 9's about Bhutto

2008-01-19T08:53:00.000-08:00

Benazir Bhutto:-

Born in 1953.

1+9+5+3 = 18 = 1+8 = 9

First suicidal attack on her

on 18 Oct.

1+8 = 9

Second Suicidal attack in which she died.

27 Dec.

2+7 = 9

She died in the year

2007

2+0+0+7 = 9

And the Total Period from 1953 to 2007

is

54 years.

5+4 = 9

She got married on
18 Dec.
1+8 = 9

& She went Out of pakistan for 9 years in
1998
1+9+9+8 = 27 = 2+7 = 9

& Came back in 2007
2+0+0+7 = 9

His Brother Shahnawaz bhutto has been murdered in
1980
1+9+8+0 =18 =1+8 =9

&
if you write Benazir Bhutto in urdu langauge (urdu text)
it contains 9 alphabets!

what do u think!
isnt Amazing?

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun) Why indian mom's are the best in world.....

2008-01-15T17:31:00.000-08:00

A young Indian man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that
he is going to get married. He says, "Ma, I'm going to bring over 3 women
and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry."
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them
down on the couch and they chat for a while. Later, he says, "Okay Ma,
guess which one I'm going to marry."
She immediately replies, "The one on the right."
" That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"

The Indian mother replies,

...
....
....
....
.....
..
..
..
..
.
............
..............
...
....
....
....
.....
..
..
..
..
.
............
..............
.

............
..............
...
....
....
....
.....
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.
............

" I don't like her " ....!!!!!!!!!! ;-)

source: Internet Forward

(Interesting) Excellence - good one

2007-11-27T01:02:00.000-08:00

A gentleman was once visiting a temple under construction.

In the temple premises, he saw a sculptor making an idol of God.

Suddenly he saw, just a few meters away, another identical idol was lying.

Surprised he asked the sculptor, "do you need two statutes of the same
idol".

"No", said the sculptor. "We need only one, but the first one got damaged at
the last stage".

The gentleman examined the statue. No apparent damage was visible.

"Where the damage is", asked the gentleman.

"There is a scratch on the nose of the idol".

"Where are you going to keep the idol?"

The sculptor replied that it will be installed on a pillar 20 feet high.

"When the idol will be 20 feet away from the eyes of the beholder, who is
going to know that there is scratch on the nose?", the gentleman asked.

The sculptor looked at the gentleman, smiled and said, "The God knows it and
I know it ".

The desire to excel should be exclusive of the fact whether someone
appreciates it or not.

*Excellence is a drive from Inside not Outside.*

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun) U.N. Worldwide survey failure

2007-11-05T07:11:00.000-08:00

A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN.

The only question asked was:

"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the Shortage Of food in rest of the world".

The survey was a huge failure........ Do you know WHY?

* In Africa they didn't know what 'food' meant.

* In India they didn't know what 'honest' meant.

* In Europe they didn't know what 'shortage' meant.

* In China they didn't know what 'opinion' meant.

* In the Middle East they didn't know what 'solution' meant.

* In South America they didn't know what 'please' meant.

* And in the USA they didn't know what 'the rest of the world' meant.

source: Internet Forward

Global Warming

2007-10-24T06:23:00.000-07:00

1. SeaIce in Retreat - about Arctic Sea
Click Here

http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2007/10/01/science/20071002_ARCTIC_GRAPHIC.html#tab5

(Fun) Letter to Bill Gates of Micorsoft

2007-10-19T08:18:00.000-07:00

This letter is from Banta Singh of Punjab to Mr. Bill Gates of Microsoft

Subject: Problems with my new computer

Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request you to check this.

2. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friends clicked 'run ' he ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so that we can click that by sitting.

3. One doubt is whether any 're-scooter' is available in system? I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.

4. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot trace the key with this ' find' button, but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem.

5. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when you will provide that?

6. I brought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows 'MY Computer': when you will provide the remaining items?

7. It is surprizing that windows says 'MY Pictures' but there is not even a single photo of mine. So when will you keep my photo in that.

8. There is 'MICROSOFT OFFICE' what about 'MICROSOFT HOME' since I use the PC at home only.

9. You provided "My Recent Documents". When you will provide "My Past Documents"?

10. You provide "My Network Places". For God shake please do not provide "My Secret Places". I do not want to let my wife know whre I go after my office hours.

Regards,

Banta

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun) The barber - Guess what he finds !

2007-10-09T21:34:00.000-07:00

There was a good old barber in Bangalore.

One day a florist goes to him for a haircut.

After the cut, he goes to pay the barber and the barber replies:

I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am doing a Community Service.

Florist is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, there is a "Thank You" Card and a dozen roses waiting at his door.

A Confectioner goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber he again refuses to take the money.

The Confectioner is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, there is another "Thank you" Card and a dozen Cakes waiting at his door.

A Software Engineer goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber again refuses the money saying that it was a community service.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, guess what he finds there......

Scroll down for answer... . . . . . . .. . . . ..

(Believe me it\'s worth it!!!!!!!!!! )
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A Dozen Software engineers waiting for a free haircut... with Printouts of Forwarded mail mentioning about free haircut!!!!! !!!!!!!!! !!!!!!

Source: Internet Forward

(Information) Self Management

2007-10-09T21:32:00.000-07:00

Self Management

You are responsible for everything that happens in your life. Learn to accept total responsibility for yourself. If you do not manage yourself, then you are letting others have control of your Life. These tips will help "you" manage "you."

Here is a list of things that help you in self management and which will in turn lead you to the path of success: -

-) Look at every new opportunity as an exciting and new-life experience.

-) Be a professional who exhibits self-confidence and self-assurance in your potential to complete any task.

-) Agree with yourself in advance that you will have a good attitude toward the upcoming task.

-) Frequently ask, "Is what I am doing right now moving me toward my goals?"

-) Do it right the first time and you will not have to take time later to fix it.

-) Accept responsibility for your job successes and failures. Do not look for a scapegoat.

-) Do not view things you do as a "job." View all activities as a challenge.

-) Use your subconscious mind by telling it to do what you do want. Instead of telling yourself, "I can't do that very well," say, "I can do this very well."-) Give yourself points for completing tasks on your "to-do" list in priority order. When you reach 10 points, reward yourself.

-) Practice your personal beliefs. It may be helpful each morning to take 15 minutes to gather your thoughts and say a prayer.

-) Make a commitment to show someone a specific accomplishment on a certain date. The added urgency will help you feel motivated to have it done.

-) Practice self-determination, wanting to do it for yourself.

-) Believe that you can be what you want to be.

-) Never criticize yourself as having a weakness. There is no such thing. You are only talking about a present undeveloped skill or part of yourself that if you so chose, you can change. You do not have any weakness, only untapped potential.

-) Be pleasant all the time-no matter what the situation.

-) Challenge yourself to do things differently than you have in the past. It provides new ideas and keeps you interested.

-) Talk to yourself. A self-talk using positive affirmation is something that is common among all great achievers. They convince themselves that they can accomplish their goals.

-) Create your own "motivation board" by putting up notes of things you need to do on a bulletin board or special wall space. It is an easily visible way to see what you need to work on. When an item is done, remove the note. Also keep your goals listed and pictured on your board.

-) Stay interested in what you are doing. Keep looking for what is interesting in your work. Change your perspective and look at it as someone outside your job would,

-) Establish personal incentives and rewards to help maintain your own high enthusiasm and performance level.

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun) Moral

2007-10-09T21:31:00.001-07:00

A Man to God

Man:"Give me a bag full of money, a job and a vehicle full of girls"

God replies:"Tataastu magane" {so it be, my son}

and made him a bus conductor of BMTC ladies special bus!

moral: be specific........

Source: Internet Forward

(Balayya Fun) Pluto Veerudu

2007-10-09T21:28:00.001-07:00

In this universe relatively many things happen with out our notice. The Planet Pluto is running loose and is heading towards New York City. While we got involved in our daily activities there comes one man, Balayya, to save the earth from this collateral damage. The story is about how our Balayya figures out the hard truth and hurdles he came across while trying to save the Earth. Can he save us all? Read on to figure it out or run to theatres near you.

Source: Vimarsakulu.com

(Vajrotsava Vedukalu) Verbal fight for 'Living Legend' / Celebrity - Mess by Mohan Babu

2007-10-09T21:26:00.001-07:00

The fight for Industry status continues one more time. On 75 Year celebrations of Telugu Industry, Mohan Babu yet another time justifies why he is not a legend and why he will not accept both the 'Living Legend' and the Celebrity award, indirectly targeting Chiranjeevi.

Source: Vimarsakulu.com

(Just Fun) balli gaadi interview on the sets of 'okka mogaadu'

2007-10-09T21:25:00.001-07:00

A recent 'encounter' with Bali Krishna on the sets of Okka Magadu:

Reporter: Hello balakrishna garu, bagunnara?

Mental balayya: bagoka povadam anedhi maa vamsam lone ledhu

Reporter: enti sir, mood baledhaa?

Mental balayya: natana anedhi maa raktham lone undhi

Reporter: mee next film enti?

Mental balayya: maa naanna garu goppa natulu. prapancha record srustincharu

Reporter: Maharadhi flop ayindani feel avutunnara?

Mental balayya: dabbu naaku avasaram ledhu. naa daggara chaala dabbu undhi

Reporter: sir, manam kastha mee cinemala gurinchi maataldukundhama?

Source: Vimarsakulu.com

(Just Fun) Balayya with Tom Hanks

2007-10-09T21:22:00.000-07:00

Our own balayya is traveling in a flight from LA to India. He happens to sit next to none other than Tom Hanks, but our great balayya does not even know tom hanks. Here goes the conversation â€“

Tom Hanks: Hi
Balayya: hey heyâ€¦. Hello.. where are you goinguuu ??

Tom Hanks: I am traveling to India. I heard a lot about that country, people say that there are lot of beautiful locations and relinquishing foodâ€¦
Balayya: hey heyâ€¦ and cinemas alsoâ€¦.

Tom hanks: yeah yeah.. thatâ€™s right. I heard about that too !! by the way, whatâ€™s your name and what do you do?

Source: Vimarsakulu.com

(Information) A small truth to make our Life 100% successful..........

2007-10-03T05:23:00.000-07:00

If
A=1
B=2
C=3
D=4
E=5
F=6
G=7
H=8
I=9
J=10
K=11
L=12
M=13
N=14
O=15
P=16
Q=17
R=18
S=19
T=20
U=21
V=22
W=23
X=24
Y=25
Z=26

Then H+A+R+D+W+O+R+K = 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

K+N+O+W+L+E+D+G+E = 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

L+O+V+E=12+15+22+5=54%

L+U+C+K = 12+21+3+11 = 47%

(None of them makes 100%)

Is it Money? ..... No!!!!!

Leadership? ...... NO!!!!

Every problem has a solution, only if we perhaps change our "ATTITUDE".
It is OUR ATTITUDE towards Life and Work that makes
OUR Life 100% Successful..

A+T+T+I+T+U+D+E = 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5=100%

Source: Internet forward

(Fun) T20 Interview (HOW INDIA WON THE CUP)

2007-10-01T04:40:00.000-07:00

Mast interview... .........

Twenty-20 - World Cup Final Post match presentation interview between
Shastri and winning caption Dhoni
This Is Ultimate

In the post-match presentation, Ravi Shastri to Dhoni "Congratulations to
you and the whole Indian team for winning this world cup. You guys have
produced a great nail baiting show.. and deserves the cup. We welcome you
to share the joy with us."

Dhoni "Thanks Ravi, the match was pretty close encounter between two great
teams and our guys held the nerve to win the game and cup."

Shastri, "Who was the main reason for this thrilling victory?"

Dhoni, "All us played well but I would say the main reason and man behind
this great victory is Ajit Agarkar"

Shocked Shastri..., "Agarkar ? ? .. how come Agarkar... he didn't played in
the final"..

Dhoni, "Yeaph.. that's the reason we won this low scoring match.. if he
could have bowled in final, Pakistan would have scored the winning runs
from his 4 overs...."

Shastri, "ok.. fine, To whom you want to thank for winning this final..."

Dhoni, "The team doctor deserves the credit... he really helped us to
prepare for the final..."

Shastri, "Is it? ?.... how the doctor helped to prepare for the final... he
is not the coach or physical trainer...Dhoni. . I am getting confusion"

Dhoni, "Ravi... nothing to confuse... he has failed Sehwag in the fitness
test according to our game plan and we managed to pick a good playing
team.. thus we weigh the doctor's contribution as very high... infact its
better than our team effort in the field.. our game tactic worked well"

Shastri, "To whom you want to dedicate this World Cup?"

Dhoni, "The entire team including myself wants to dedicate this cup to
Sachin, Dravid and Ganguly..."

Shastri, "I really really appreciate you... its good that you have so much
respect to the seniors....and you ...."

Dhoni interrupts.. .. "Ravi.. let me complete... India would have exited in
the Group matches if they decided to play in the series... thank god they
opted out and we managed to play cricket and won the cup.."

Shastri, "The match was thrilling encounter and was concluded by a single
mistake of Misbah.. Isn't it? "

Dhoni, "Yes you are right, after lofting the ball Misbah told me that he
has send the ball to where there was no one....but he didn't know that
there is a malayali in every corner of the world.... This single mistake
has costed the game and won the cup..."

Shastri faints and Dhoni receives the CUP and thats the end of the great
Twenty-20 world cup..

Source: Internet Forward

(Interesting) Who is Aryan? - Yevaru Aryan, yevaru Dravidian

2007-09-21T22:43:00.000-07:00

For more details: Click Here
http://www.hvk.org/articles/1003/164.html

- This is an article in New Indian Express, dated Oct 26th, 2003.
Please ignore if you have read this article already.

Reason to stress on reading this article:-

I have seen people using terms "Dravidian" and "Aryan" to classify
various things. In reality, they does not go for classification and usage
of these terms is not correct - like, aryans came from external part
and moved dravidians towards south etc.

To the best of my knowledge usage of terms: "dravidan" and "aryan"
to classify people in indian-subcontinent is not correct.

This topic is open for debate. Lets discuss on this.

(Fun and Leisure) Me doing random steps for Friend's Birthday

2007-09-16T20:59:00.000-07:00

Occasion: Love Mendiratta's Birthday

Song: Urvasi Ursavi

Movie: Tamil - Kadhalan (Premikudu in Telugu)

(Spiritual and Devotional) Bhagavad Gita related links

2007-09-16T12:13:00.000-07:00

1. Free book from Yoga Vidya.com - http://www.yogavidya.com/Yoga/BhagavadGita.pdf

2. Gita Saramsh (English) chapters ans complete summary - http://www.bhagavad-gita.us/

(Fun) Software Life Telugu Lo !

2007-09-07T09:17:00.000-07:00

For complete view, Please Click here

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun) "potentially and reality"

2007-07-11T07:51:00.000-07:00

Youngest Son: Tell me Daddy, what is the difference between
"potentially and reality"?

Dad : I will show you ,Dad turns to his wife and asks her: Would you
sleep with Robert Redford for 1 million dollars?

Wife: Yes of course! I would never waste such an opportunity!

Then Dad asks his daughter, if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for 1
million dollars? Daughter: Wow! Yes! This is my
fantasy!

So Dad turns to his elder son and asks him: Would you sleep with Tom
Cruise for 1 million dollars?
Elder Son: Yeah! Why not? Imagine what I could do with 1 million dollars!
I would never hesitate!

So the father turns back to his younger son saying: You see son,
" potentially" we are sitting on 3 million dollars,
but in "reality" we are living with 2 prs-ti-tu-tes and 1 gay!

Source: Internet forward

2007-07-11T07:40:00.000-07:00

(Fun) Less Known Facts - about Bill Gates.....don't miss the last one

1. Bill Gates earns US$250 every SECOND,
that's
about US$20 Million a DAY
and
US$7.8 Billion a YEAR!

2. If he drops a thousand dollars, he won't even
bother to pick it up
bcoz during the 4 seconds he picks it, he
would've already earned it back.

3. The US national debt is about 5.62 trillion dollars,
if Bill Gates were to
pay the debt by himself;
he will finish it in less then 10 years.

4. He can donate US$15 to everyone on earth but
still be left with US$ 5 Million for his pocket money.

5. Michael Jordan is the highest paid athlete in US.
If he doesn't drink and eat, and keeps up his annual income
i.e. US$30 Million, he'll have to wait for 277 years to become as
rich as Bill Gates is now.

6. If Bill Gates was a country, he would be the
37th richest country on earth.

7. If you change all of Bill Gate's money to US$1 notes, you can
make a road from the earth to moon, 14 times back and forth.

But you have to make that road non-stop for 1,400 years, and
use a total of 713 BOEING 747 planes to transport all the
money.

8. Bill Gates is 40 this year. If we assume that
he will live for another 35 years, he has to spend US$6.78 Million
per day to finish all his money before he goes to heaven.

Last but not the least : The Best One !!

9. If Microsoft Windows' users can claim US$1 for every
Time their computers hang because of Microsoft Windows,
Bill Gates will be bankrupt in 3 years

Source: Internet forward

Bommarillu Dialogues in Software Context (Hilarious)

2007-06-15T08:18:00.001-07:00

Have some time and patience to read!!

In his meeting with his Project Leader after a long time, Siddhu explodes
Antha meere cheesaru... Motham meere cheesaru....
Chalu Sir... vachinnapadinunchi meeru naacheta cheyinchindi chalu, nenu
kolpoindi chalu, inka oddu please....

Sir asks what did you lost ???

Inka ardam kaaleda meeku. Ee COMPANY ki ochhinappudu naa deggara emundo,
velipoyetappudu emiledho ade Sir nenu kolipoindi- Programming skills.
Chinna chinna skills kuda kolipoyanu Sir meevalla.

Meereppudu mee team cheta goppa project cheyinchali, R&D work
cheyinchalani alochistharu. Kaani nakem vachoo, nenemi cheyyagalanoo meeru
thelusukooru.

Then Sir tells that he thinks 1000 times before giving any work !!!

Avunu.... 1000 saarlu client requirements satisfy ayyaya ani alochisthaare
tappa, oka saari ayina nenu adi chayyagalanaa ani alochinchhara.
cheyyagaligina danikanna ekkuva work ivvadamlo satisfaction meeku telusu,
kaani ichina work avvakapothe andhulo unde baadha meeku thelidu- naaku
thelusu.

Asalu naatho maatladithega theliseedi nenemi chestunnanoo. Edaina problem
unte team lo vunna migilina vaallani pilichi maatlaaduthaaru. Naatho
maatladandi Sir. Na work choosi cheppandi Sir. Friendly ga undandi Sir.

Then Sir tells that he is the one who usually tells to be friendly

Chepputhaaru , kani undaru. Endukante antha meeku nachhinatte
jaragalikada.

Cheyyalsina Language meere select chesthaaru, meere super antaru, kani adi
work out avutundoo ledoo kooda choodakundane meeru nanne convince
chesesthaaru.
Naku ela untundo telusa- idi raadu... nenu cheyyalenu ani aravalani
anipistundi.

USE CASES cheyyamantaru. Nenu chestanu. Kaani cheselope LLD ki
marchestaru. Navvuthunnru Sir naa project choosi maa freinds.

Hey Balu...., sample program cheyyamantaru. Nenedoo code raastaanu.
Meermoo CODING STANDARDS follow avvu.... COMMENTS rayyi.....FUNCTIONS
RAYATAM try cheyyi....
ani roju naa chutto tirugutoo arustoo vuntaru.

Nenelaa code rayaloo kooda meere decide chesesthe...nenu enduku Sir
program raayadam....
Chivariki program elaa debug cheyyaaloo kooda meere cheppestunte...
Complie kavatam ledu Sir.

Meeku teleedu. meeru cheppindi cheyyalekaa, naaku vachhindi cheppaleeka,
narakam choosanu Sir... narakam.

Frustration, kopam, chiraaku. Evarimeedha choopinchaalo, ela choopinchaalo
kooda theliyakapothe chivariki oka rooju Swagat meeda kooda arichesaanu.
Daanitho Swagat naatho matladatham manesaadu. Asalu nenendhuku ala
unnano
Swagat ke ardam kakapothe inka meekela telustundi Sir.

Ippudu neenemi cheyali Sir. BUGS FIX cheyyali..anthe kadaa. Chestanu Sir.
Kaani ippatidaaka nenu chesinaa UI DESIGNING....PROGRAMMING. evemi work
out kaaledu Sir.
Kaani ippudu chestunna Singapore project kachitam gaa Reuslt ravali. kaani
edo oka roju adi kooda raadu ani telisipotundi kadaa. Appudu naa project
spoil ayyindi ani meere badhapadataru.

Inthavaraku meeroka guide gaa gelichaanu anukuntunaaru kadaa ???. Kaani
mimmalni gelipinchadaaniki rendu yellaga neenu odipothoone unnanu.

ilaage oddipothu unthe, year ending lo entra naa project ani chooste
andulo emi vundadu.
Innallu nenu project cheyyatledu sir, chestunnattu act chesanu, ika mundu
kooda alage untanu.

Kaani naado request sir... nenu cheyyaleni work ichhesi nenedo
cheseyyalani maathram korukovoddu sir, please.

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun) Good one - compiled before during March 2007

2007-05-30T04:43:00.000-07:00

There was a couple married for quite some time and they had a boy of 5-6 years old. Their relationship was turning sour.

So finally it reached such a stage that they thought it was better for them to be divorced than carry on such a relationship.
So they consulted a lawyer. But the big question was who would have the kid.

In the hearing in the court; it was decided that this choice should be left on the kid.

So the judge asked "Son would you like to stay with your mummy?"

Kid said, "No, mummy beats me."

So the judge asked "Then, would you like to stay with your papa then?

Kid said, "No, papa beats me."

Now the judge was in a dilemma and was not able to decide what to do... after pondering for some time he smiled with the ideas he had in his mind about the child......

And he gave the judgment that the kid would stay with......

Any guesses????? ???

Come on I know you can make it......

Ok here goes the answer.

The kid would stay with the Indian Cricket Team because they
NEVER BEAT ANYBODY !! NOT EVEN BANGLADESH
Hoo ha India ....!!!! ;)))))))))))))))))

Source: Internet Forward

(Fun) An Impossible wish

2007-05-30T04:24:00.000-07:00

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer.

Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want."

The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources.

I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me."

The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."

The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"

Source: Internet forward

(Fun) Before and After Marriage

2007-05-30T00:40:00.000-07:00

Before the marriage:

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: NO! Don't even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: NO! Why you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Yes!
She: Will you hit me?
He: No way! I'm not such kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes.

After marriage : you can read it from the bottom, up words !!!!

Source: Internet forward

(Fun) Tester irritating Developer !

2007-05-30T00:37:00.000-07:00

How Roshan D'Mello (QA Tester) frustrates developer (Mukesh Thakur)

Roshan D'Mello: Hey Mukesh, there is a bug in your code. Type a text in user name text box and press enter. Beep sound doesn't appear.

Mukesh Thakur: How can that be a bug? There is no requirement that beep sound should come. Anyway, I will assign it to offshore and get it fixed.

After 2 days,

Mukesh Thakur: Roshan, bug is fixed. Please verify.

After another 2 days,

Roshan D'Mello: I have re-opened the bug because sound is not coming in some PCs. Sound is coming in my machine, but my colleague Rajat Choudhry is not getting the sound.

After another 2 days,

Mukesh Thakur: Not a bug. I observed that your friend Rajat Choudhry has old IBM machine. Unlike your DELL machine, IBM machines do not have inbuilt speakers. So, to hear the sound in Rajat Choudhry's machine, please use head phones and then get the bug closed soon.

Another 2 days,

Roshan D'Mello: I have re-opened the bug because sound tone is different across different machines. Sound is coming as 'BEEP' in my machine, but my colleague Rajat Choudhry who is having IBM machine is getting the sound as 'TONG'.

Mukesh Thakur: Not a bug. Get lost man. What can we do for the bug? The two machines are built in such a way that they produce different sounds. Do you expect the developers to rebuild the IBM processors to make them uniform? Please close it.

Another 2 days,

Roshan D'Mello: I have re-opened the bug because intensity of beep sound produced on 2 different DELL machines is different. My machine produces beep sound of intensity 10 decibels whereas my friend's machine produces sound worth 20 decibels. Fix your code to make the sound uniform across all machines.

Another 2 days later,

Mukesh Thakur: Once again it is not a bug. I have noticed that the volume set is different on the two machines. Ensure that volume is same in both the machines before I get mad and then close the bug.

Another 2 days,

Roshan D'Mello: I have re-opened the bug.

Mukesh Thakur: What ?? Why? What more stupid reasons can be there for re-opening?

Roshan D'Mello: Sound intensity is different for machines placed at different locations (different buildings). So, I have re-opened it.

After 2 days,

Mukesh Thakur: I have made some scientists do an acoustical analysis of the two buildings you used for testing. They have observed that the acoustics in the two buildings varies to a large extent. That is why sound intensity is different across the 2 buildings. So, I beg you to please close the bugs.

After 1 year

Roshan D'Mello: I am re-opeing the bug. During the year, I requested the clients to arrange architects to build two buildings with same acoustical features, so that I can test it again. Now, when I tested, I found that intensity of sound still varying. So, I am re-opening the defect.

Mukesh Thakur: GROWLLLL.....I am really mad now. I am sure that the sound waves of the two buildings are getting distorted due to some background noice or something. Now I need to waste time to prove that it is because of background noice.

Roshan D'Mello: No need for that. We will put the machines and run them in vacuum and see.

Mukesh Thakur: (not alive)

Source: Internet forward

I am Kalyan

2007-03-14T08:06:00.000-07:00

hi ,

I am Raghu Kalyan Anna.